You've probably
noticed we love
what we do

I just blew my nose in my notes.”

That egg is dumb.”

I try not to have too many hobbies.”

What can I say? I have uncontrollable eyebrows.”

I have a weird cheese story for you.”

That's why I don't eat it out of a can; I eat it out of a bag.”

Not wearing black is Emily's pink.”

400 pounds plus adrenaline, and I could flip a car, easy.”

I haven't had a muffler since 2020”

Every time she raises her hand an egg dies.”

Remember when you threw décor at me?”

It smells like the 80s.”

Entertainment Tonight is where dreams go to die.”

You're eating the chicken crust.”

It's what's for dinner.”

We have flippage!”

Young Sam Elliot is a head-turner!”

Oooh, it's propagating!”

A guy named Jerry has 20 watermelons in his truck.”

Steve, you should come look at these sandwich pictures.”

Trash day is the only thing that anchors me.”

It's like Top Chef, but with vodka.”

It's too sausagy.”

I think what we should probably do, is nothing.”

The wild cheeses grow aplenty here.”

I was working, until I got distracted by this Madonna song.”

I need a more magical word for "practical."”

I'm not trying to make my turnips rot you guys.”

Check your email before you put your pants on.”

That's a lawsuit pickle right there.”

I don't think real cowboys do this much ironing.”

I was just there for the Year of the Spatula.”

Stop counting the dents in my can of food.”

It's like a statue of my dog with a mustache on it.”

It's like, the future.”

I found Pickle Doritos at a rest stop.”

It's like an easy bake oven for adults who like chicken.”

The dog arrived before the paintings.”

Have you heard about the whaler-pirate guy?”

I can turn my funks off.”

You should watch Labyrinth if you're into Muppets.”

Location ID = 23 Bread Bowl = False (AKA: The Breadbowl Module is Broken.)”

A pickle chip got caught in the wheels of my chair.”

The donut button isn't working.”

I can still smell Steve.”

I only got to Utah before I quit.”

I'm trying to think of a more magical word for practical.”

I've been thinking about that wolf tie.”

Come and get it, Sammy Hagar!”

This is too helpful.”

Where we're going, we don't need rollovers!”

It's too Skittly.”

I thought I was done with zombies.”

Those weren't professional quality mustaches.”

Why is the llama-cam shaking?”

Bring it all to the corn dog party!”

I love mint-forward. ”

All caps, all the time.”

I'm not giving my money to YouTube. YouTube is all horsey and gross.”

I bought a Chewbacca shirt but I keep forgetting to wear it.”

It's a torsional thing.”

Gonna write up the changes on a stone tablet like it's the Jurassic era.”

Shrimp is too squeaky for the morning.”

Oh I'm smart! I'm artificial!”

How would you get DNA from Elvis?”

I've never seen the 80s.”

It was like B-side Tony the Tiger.”

Can I be Josh for Halloween?”

No one is as f*#¥%#! good as Katelyn. She’s got two degrees.”

It's like a pair of pants, for your car.”

My version of a beard is a hat.”

These people drive like animals.”

It doesn't work in Safari.”

Is that horse wearing shorts?”

Cat-flavored ice cream?”

Rhinos are a big deal.”

I've been to New Jersey?”

Steve's probably listening to Fiona Apple.”

This tastes like Steve's car.”

I've looked at that alpaca all day.”

You do seem like the type of guy who'd drink pickle juice.”

What kind of single-finger crimes can you commit?”

I want the whole tomato.”

I didn't want to spend $40 on a banana costume.”

It's like if I had muscles but with quarters.”

It works!”

What about ferrets? Ferrets are weird.”

That's why I'm walking away while you look at pictures of Rob Van Dam.”

I'm just not used to Kory wearing pants.”

I'm wing-dingin' it.”

Please pray for Mrs. Haskel's tomatoes.”

Facebook's telling me I'm fat.”

I'd rather be Garamond than Papyrus.”

I think I was bitten by a rattlesnake in a past life.”

It's not urgent, aside from the building being on fire.”

It wasn't like that a minute ago.”

I once smuggled a Subway footlong in my sweatshirt pocket. ”

He's just mad because he can't be a wizard.”

Fancy code is the only kind I write.”

They're like little rock possums!”

The cats came with the man.”

It's like, the Jedi.”

What don't you think should be converted into a fish tank?”

It's the web equivalent of a junk drawer.”

There are no conifer trees in here.”

There's a lot of dirt down here.”

An ice cream truck drove through this design.”

It looks like a big dinosaur protecting a translucent bag of smaller dinosaurs”

Hot yoga, Steve? No, goat.”

I wanna smell how cold it is.”

I'm sorry about the div.”

Can you Swissify it?”

You'd suck at being a zombie.”

Where did you live, a coal chute?”

Did I do that during the pandemic?”

Can you bring your horse?”

It's like Smash Mouth in the 90's”

Are we going to a place I can wear slippers?”

Try not to make it too caskety.”

Teresa, you haven't given me an answer, you've only given me s*!%.”

It was working a minute ago.”

Eating peaches with a spoon stinks.”

What's that band? 100 Haircuts?”

He's got an eyepatch sorta vibe.”

Stay in your happy little design world.”

I don't recall there being an h in leprechaun.”

I'd try human. (on the topic of cannibalism)”

I feel like I just try too much sometimes.”

That's just how I like my mugs: Cheap and Swiss.”

Birthday Mullet Hammer Pants”

I mean, how much Jeff Bridges can you have in one movie?”

Like, the food kind, or the magical kind?”

This sushi is quite delicious. If you like the taste of death.”

What are these ribbons your horse keeps winning?”

It's like The Sixth Sense, but with tacos.”

Instructions unclear, I have peanut butter on my hands.”

In Belgium, there's a tax for things that are too multitasky.”

I'm out here changing the Internet.”

No cults or dying, please. It's Friday.”

Dark Mode is ruining my life.”

What kind of shoes, cotton candy?”

I would put that in Someone Said if it wasn't so disgusting.”

If it's not moist, I'm not interested in having it thrown on my desk.”

Look at his bag of hot dog boxes on the floor!”

It looks, feels, and smells great!”

I hate Internet Explorer.”

...And that is why you don't wear sandals to Blossom.”

I'm going to pull out the Real Joe Pesci Hat.”

I'll die if I smell like a hamster.”

There's wine on your motherboard.”

Must. Resist. Cacao.”

Steve, let's go somewhere, just you and me.”

Your sweat smells like Dolce & Gabbana.”

Gettin' mean... in a nice way.”

She’s like the Taylor Swift of silversmithing. ”

It's like, I read books, but I also party.”

Internet Explorer is ruining this.”

Why is there a piece of cheese in my purse?”

Kohl's and casinos — no windows.”

Move. You're where my Diet Coke goes.”

'M', as in Machu Picchu.”

You have some mustard on your forehead. ”

There is no light, only Dark Mode.”

You can't ship pickles.”

(on St. Patrick's Day) Happy Thanksgiving!”

Something is wrong with the server.”

I don't know who you think you are, coming up in here with a taco.”

Eating beans from a can like a hobo!”

I'm gonna make websites out of wood.”

PBS is very : colon-y.”

Also, they have a great toe box.”

They'll do anything for a ribbon and a hamburger.”

It's like a new Tool album for me.”

I can get behind an animal with a handlebar mustache.”

More bugs than expected. 4 stars. ”

Look at the eyes on that Red-Legged Honeycreeper!”

I've never had much luck with rabbits.”

He's building a car and doing his spy run.”

I don't foresee whales having cell phones.”

Never get into a fistfight with a puppeteer.”

I forgot outside was a place I could go.”

You forgot the witch supplies!”

He sucked at watching TV.”

Salad's nasty.”

Murderer at nine o'clock!”

This knob makes me want to get drunk.”

I want a corn dog scented candle.”

I am the ghost of Tractor Supply Company.”

You're the Sherlock Holmes of the digital age.”

I’m getting a full-on chest plate tattoo of FORM riding on the back of a magical unicorn to show my appreciation.”

It'll be in the Someone Said that's in your heart.”

It should be a little Burt Reynolds.”

I need to know more about that cat!”

I'm bringing iFrames back.”

I've been here before - I was looking for a baby!”

Oh, sorry! I'll just rewrite the Web.”

You can't out-do the fish with sneakers.”

Is this the collective smell of humanity?”

Sassy Cap'n McBeef O'Brady”

I said something about sausage, but I don't remember what it was.”

I don't want this bacon on here any more.”

What is life if not just a series of great chairs?”

I can't wait to put that on a T-shirt.”

People are weird in the spring, man.”

No amount of money is worth your husband having a mustache.”

I can't wait to dance on the grave of that site.”

Please ignore me collating behind you.”

You're always picked last and your pasta smells.”

You reach into your heart and pull out a potholder.”

Wait 'til I get this gas station food, then order in.”

Is that a convertible hearse?”

I just had an Emeril moment.”

My whole life is a circular formula.”

I'm gonna rock that perm!”

I'm sitting down here with Hot Popcorn Hands.”

I had some chicken wings in my car that I was going to give you. ”

My middle toe went numb and I thought I had something in my shoe.”

The 80's called and they want their wine back.”

I'm sorry I'm not a sock connoisseur.”

I can tell by the look on your face that you're not going to be of any help.”

But, Saul Bass already used all the good shapes.”

It doesn't work in IE.”

Emotionally, my hands are in my pockets.”

He's magic. He's practically a leprechaun.”

I just smelled fries in my head.”

Then I thought, why not just make it Helvetica?”

Babies aren't supposed to look like Woody Harrelson. ”

Pockets full of coffee.”

We're not counting the tiny chickens.”

I have an item of boot business to discuss.”

One time I set myself on fire.”

There is no reason for Bob Evans.”

Full of secrets and bees. ”

There are four purses in my purse.”

Why'd you put me out like that about the Lion King?”

I'd go to a goat rodeo.”

Thankfully, Mercury in retrograde ends today.”

If this were a book, I would totally read it.”

I'm gonna crop out the crusty parts.”

Beige is not an image.”

You wanna do hot dogs Friday?”

That horse looks like Burt Russel Crowe.”

Michael do you want something pumpkin-spiced?”

Don't come at me with your popcorn problems.”

Make it extra-white. #GGGGGG”

I don't like the weather tellin' me what to do.”

I just keep making ears by accident.”

Settle down, Mailchimp.”

Did you say "jQuery" or "Katie Perry"?”

The Muppets are my Downton Abbey.”

If the Long Island Medium were here, she'd freak out.”

How much bread would it take to feed a scorpion for a week?”

I'm dealing with some very important kangaroo things right now.”

IE is the DMV of the Internet.”

I call those dinosaurs daddy long necks.”

Let's see, so the chicken goes in the middle...”

Activate the chicken!”

Lower case "m" is the best letter.”

Mister-I'm-Never-Wrong!”

Was that Rod Stewart?”

Is hot dog one word or two?”

These zombies look like cauliflower.”

That's a good lookin monkey.”

If you had a hot dog roller and went shopping for sausages, things might change.”

I just wanna eat this sandwich.”

The hands are the face of the arm.”

1-2-3 Cheeseburger Lane!”

The meatball machine is broken.”

How am I supposed to get through my workday when I have to take care of all these tiny people in my phone?”

Acknowledge my math!”

Our sponsors are our butter, our members are our bread.”

You just have to hope for the best until it doesn't happen.”

It's a pickle wearing a cape; I think it's self-explanatory.”

There's a lot of outer space.”

They should do Animal Crossing on the moon.”

I think what we should plan to do, is nothing.”

I think I'm gonna have to set something on fire.”

Whoa! That's the monkey!”

I'm trying to use your design elements but I'm not sure I like them.”

That's great, now there's bacon bits in my keyboard.”

I can’t type expletives without the expletives. ”

Are pigs becoming extinct?”

I'm no stranger to a rotten banana.”

It's like drinking a little garden.”

Batteries? Seriously? What is this, 1985?”

I had a pencil sharpener shaped like a boat.”

I'm programming in my head.”

I'm trying to figure out what kind of harvester to use for canola.”

I would rather have moist than wet food, thank you very much.”

This is not your grandmother's website!”

Why'd you walk over here like Stone Cold Steve Austin?”

I keep thinking about that wolf tie.”

The conference template fills me with dread.”

We're not eating it, we're just looking at it!”

I wish I could draw RoboCop.”

I can't solve a three-year-old's bee jokes.”

It's broken.”

I can handle a lot of Jeff Bridges in one movie.”

Haven't we tortured cauliflower enough?”

Let's not get in a fight with a horse.”

C'mon. Lemme see your turkey burgers.”

You look at your astronaut food. I'm gonna work.”

Well. I guess we're having stock photos for lunch.”

I know how I like my files: Large.”

This phone call is messing up my hair.”

Well, we have mustaches upstairs.”

Is toe box one word or two?”

I'm going to look up thesaurus in the dictionary.”

A person can be positive, AND also inappropriate.”

Long story short... I'm a genius, and we don't need a new Roomba.”

I don't like wearing pants.”

It's been two days since Monday.”

I'm not at a place in my heart where I can eat a bear.”

It's too Skynrdy.”

I don't want to chase the red sweater. I just want to buy the red sweater.”

Who am I, Benjamin Franklin?”

I'm thinking like four, maybe five steps ahead of you.”

I can't juggle a fish, that's for sure.”

Your hat smells like bologna.”

Beige is not a color.”

You see that giant hot dog?”

It reminds me of an old calculator.”

Who is Batman and The Drumstick?”

It's dark and gloomy with zombies, but I think I'll keep my sunglasses on.”

Yeah I'm turtlin'!”

Adam Driver is the Sarah Jessica Parker of men.”

Math is black.”

They're like the seagulls of birds.”

Maybe it’s coincidence, maybe it‘s Oppenheimer. ”

The football game or the moon landing?”

Let's talk about donuts. ”

No, *YOU* need megadoses of vitamin D.”

Helvetica Light makes me think you're lying.”

I tried the peanut butter trick with Jelly before.”

My goal is to live until 2085.”

They have that dirty ketchup money.”

Her abs look like a turtle shell.”

The air doesn't taste like pancakes!”

It's like a clown car of drawers.”

Those stupid little pickles.”

It’s just weird that this is like a “walkin’-around” place. ”

Always cut toward your innards.”

No. They don't have budget for robots.”

Squirrels don't have pants.”

They're switchin' browsers and clearin' cookies!”

I switched to the California Raisins pillowcase last night.”

Did you just raise the roof on jQuery?”

I got this whole thing of Silly Putty stuck on my sleeve.”

Light the content candle!”