You've probably
noticed we love
what we do

It's broken.”

The air doesn't taste like pancakes!”

You do seem like the type of guy who'd drink pickle juice.”

Why'd you walk over here like Stone Cold Steve Austin?”

I have an item of boot business to discuss.”

Must. Resist. Cacao.”

Did I do that during the pandemic?”

Look at his bag of hot dog boxes on the floor!”

How would you get DNA from Elvis?”

These zombies look like cauliflower.”

I was working, until I got distracted by this Madonna song.”

That's just how I like my mugs: Cheap and Swiss.”

Also, they have a great toe box.”

Activate the chicken!”

I don't foresee whales having cell phones.”

I want the whole tomato.”

A guy named Jerry has 20 watermelons in his truck.”

No one is as f*#¥%#! good as Katelyn. She’s got two degrees.”

Those weren't professional quality mustaches.”

Bring it all to the corn dog party!”

I've never had much luck with rabbits.”

I feel like I just try too much sometimes.”

You should watch Labyrinth if you're into Muppets.”

I'm bringing iFrames back.”

I need to know more about that cat!”

I was just there for the Year of the Spatula.”

Babies aren't supposed to look like Woody Harrelson. ”

I think what we should probably do, is nothing.”

I’m getting a full-on chest plate tattoo of FORM riding on the back of a magical unicorn to show my appreciation.”

I'm sorry I'm not a sock connoisseur.”

You can't ship pickles.”

They should do Animal Crossing on the moon.”

They'll do anything for a ribbon and a hamburger.”

It's dark and gloomy with zombies, but I think I'll keep my sunglasses on.”

We're not eating it, we're just looking at it!”

Settle down, Mailchimp.”

A person can be positive, AND also inappropriate.”

I've never seen the 80s.”

If this were a book, I would totally read it.”

The dog arrived before the paintings.”

Your hat smells like bologna.”

Emotionally, my hands are in my pockets.”

I try not to have too many hobbies.”

I'm wing-dingin' it.”

It reminds me of an old calculator.”

Dark Mode is ruining my life.”

Steve's probably listening to Fiona Apple.”

It's like if I had muscles but with quarters.”

Acknowledge my math!”

I'm out here changing the Internet.”

Batteries? Seriously? What is this, 1985?”

If you had a hot dog roller and went shopping for sausages, things might change.”

It's the web equivalent of a junk drawer.”

Not wearing black is Emily's pink.”

It's like an easy bake oven for adults who like chicken.”

Our sponsors are our butter, our members are our bread.”

No amount of money is worth your husband having a mustache.”

I can't juggle a fish, that's for sure.”

Wait 'til I get this gas station food, then order in.”

You're eating the chicken crust.”

Whoa! That's the monkey!”

It's too sausagy.”

It's too Skynrdy.”

But, Saul Bass already used all the good shapes.”

It's like, the future.”

That's why I don't eat it out of a can; I eat it out of a bag.”

Mister-I'm-Never-Wrong!”

I don't want this bacon on here any more.”

Did you just raise the roof on jQuery?”

It's a torsional thing.”

You have some mustard on your forehead. ”

They're like the seagulls of birds.”

That's a good lookin monkey.”

Is hot dog one word or two?”

You're the Sherlock Holmes of the digital age.”

I can't wait to dance on the grave of that site.”

Well, we have mustaches upstairs.”

Have you heard about the whaler-pirate guy?”

How am I supposed to get through my workday when I have to take care of all these tiny people in my phone?”

I can't wait to put that on a T-shirt.”

I only got to Utah before I quit.”

Well. I guess we're having stock photos for lunch.”

I mean, how much Jeff Bridges can you have in one movie?”

I said something about sausage, but I don't remember what it was.”

I got this whole thing of Silly Putty stuck on my sleeve.”

It smells like the 80s.”

My middle toe went numb and I thought I had something in my shoe.”

Is toe box one word or two?”

It's like Top Chef, but with vodka.”

Let's see, so the chicken goes in the middle...”

The wild cheeses grow aplenty here.”

Every time she raises her hand an egg dies.”

No cults or dying, please. It's Friday.”

I just keep making ears by accident.”

Fancy code is the only kind I write.”

Are we going to a place I can wear slippers?”

Lower case "m" is the best letter.”

I'm thinking like four, maybe five steps ahead of you.”

It's like Smash Mouth in the 90's”

I've been to New Jersey?”

You look at your astronaut food. I'm gonna work.”

Math is black.”

I think what we should plan to do, is nothing.”

Please pray for Mrs. Haskel's tomatoes.”

It's like a new Tool album for me.”

Is that a convertible hearse?”

There's a lot of outer space.”

It should be a little Burt Reynolds.”

Light the content candle!”

He's building a car and doing his spy run.”

Thankfully, Mercury in retrograde ends today.”

This knob makes me want to get drunk.”

I'd rather be Garamond than Papyrus.”

I can handle a lot of Jeff Bridges in one movie.”

There are four purses in my purse.”

I didn't want to spend $40 on a banana costume.”

It's like drinking a little garden.”

I'm programming in my head.”

Instructions unclear, I have peanut butter on my hands.”

I can get behind an animal with a handlebar mustache.”

That's why I'm walking away while you look at pictures of Rob Van Dam.”

I'm going to look up thesaurus in the dictionary.”

I bought a Chewbacca shirt but I keep forgetting to wear it.”

It's like, the Jedi.”

What's that band? 100 Haircuts?”

You see that giant hot dog?”

There's wine on your motherboard.”

Can you Swissify it?”

You're always picked last and your pasta smells.”

I'm not trying to make my turnips rot you guys.”

Stay in your happy little design world.”

I found Pickle Doritos at a rest stop.”

Try not to make it too caskety.”

My version of a beard is a hat.”

Location ID = 23 Bread Bowl = False (AKA: The Breadbowl Module is Broken.)”

Then I thought, why not just make it Helvetica?”

Beige is not a color.”

If the Long Island Medium were here, she'd freak out.”

It’s just weird that this is like a “walkin’-around” place. ”

I've been here before - I was looking for a baby!”

Where we're going, we don't need rollovers!”

I'm gonna rock that perm!”

We have flippage!”

He sucked at watching TV.”

Who is Batman and The Drumstick?”

PBS is very : colon-y.”

It's like a statue of my dog with a mustache on it.”

This is not your grandmother's website!”

It's a pickle wearing a cape; I think it's self-explanatory.”

I'd try human. (on the topic of cannibalism)”

Is this the collective smell of humanity?”

I once smuggled a Subway footlong in my sweatshirt pocket. ”

I had some chicken wings in my car that I was going to give you. ”

It wasn't like that a minute ago.”

I can't solve a three-year-old's bee jokes.”

What about ferrets? Ferrets are weird.”

What are these ribbons your horse keeps winning?”

It's like The Sixth Sense, but with tacos.”

Please ignore me collating behind you.”

It was working a minute ago.”

They're switchin' browsers and clearin' cookies!”

No. They don't have budget for robots.”

The donut button isn't working.”

Don't come at me with your popcorn problems.”

Like, the food kind, or the magical kind?”

You forgot the witch supplies!”

The conference template fills me with dread.”

Helvetica Light makes me think you're lying.”

There's a lot of dirt down here.”

I think I'm gonna have to set something on fire.”

I call those dinosaurs daddy long necks.”

It's been two days since Monday.”

I've looked at that alpaca all day.”

I'm no stranger to a rotten banana.”

It looks, feels, and smells great!”

Internet Explorer is ruining this.”

Yeah I'm turtlin'!”

What can I say? I have uncontrollable eyebrows.”

He's magic. He's practically a leprechaun.”

I can’t type expletives without the expletives. ”

The Muppets are my Downton Abbey.”

The hands are the face of the arm.”

Let's talk about donuts. ”

...And that is why you don't wear sandals to Blossom.”

Teresa, you haven't given me an answer, you've only given me s*!%.”

You just have to hope for the best until it doesn't happen.”

Never get into a fistfight with a puppeteer.”

I'm gonna crop out the crusty parts.”

It looks like a big dinosaur protecting a translucent bag of smaller dinosaurs”

I switched to the California Raisins pillowcase last night.”

I just blew my nose in my notes.”

An ice cream truck drove through this design.”

A pickle chip got caught in the wheels of my chair.”

I hate Internet Explorer.”

They're like little rock possums!”

It doesn't work in Safari.”

It's too Skittly.”

I forgot outside was a place I could go.”

You reach into your heart and pull out a potholder.”

I'm going to pull out the Real Joe Pesci Hat.”

I wanna smell how cold it is.”

Check your email before you put your pants on.”

Why is there a piece of cheese in my purse?”

One time I set myself on fire.”

She’s like the Taylor Swift of silversmithing. ”

I need a more magical word for "practical."”

It was like B-side Tony the Tiger.”

Oooh, it's propagating!”

Shrimp is too squeaky for the morning.”

I keep thinking about that wolf tie.”

I'm trying to figure out what kind of harvester to use for canola.”

Come and get it, Sammy Hagar!”

I don't know who you think you are, coming up in here with a taco.”

Those stupid little pickles.”

That horse looks like Burt Russel Crowe.”

Always cut toward your innards.”

It works!”

I just wanna eat this sandwich.”

I'm trying to use your design elements but I'm not sure I like them.”

I'm not at a place in my heart where I can eat a bear.”

I'm gonna make websites out of wood.”

I know how I like my files: Large.”

My whole life is a circular formula.”

I'm sitting down here with Hot Popcorn Hands.”

Steve, let's go somewhere, just you and me.”

Sassy Cap'n McBeef O'Brady”

Make it extra-white. #GGGGGG”

I can still smell Steve.”

Look at the eyes on that Red-Legged Honeycreeper!”

Squirrels don't have pants.”

Rhinos are a big deal.”

I'm trying to think of a more magical word for practical.”

Something is wrong with the server.”

You wanna do hot dogs Friday?”

These people drive like animals.”

Remember when you threw décor at me?”

I don't like the weather tellin' me what to do.”

I would put that in Someone Said if it wasn't so disgusting.”

I'm dealing with some very important kangaroo things right now.”

What kind of single-finger crimes can you commit?”

Gettin' mean... in a nice way.”

This is too helpful.”

Murderer at nine o'clock!”

Stop counting the dents in my can of food.”

1-2-3 Cheeseburger Lane!”

Are pigs becoming extinct?”

Oh I'm smart! I'm artificial!”

Michael do you want something pumpkin-spiced?”

I'll die if I smell like a hamster.”

I want a corn dog scented candle.”

My goal is to live until 2085.”

I don't recall there being an h in leprechaun.”

I had a pencil sharpener shaped like a boat.”

Can you bring your horse?”

I just had an Emeril moment.”

There are no conifer trees in here.”

Haven't we tortured cauliflower enough?”

More bugs than expected. 4 stars. ”

Long story short... I'm a genius, and we don't need a new Roomba.”

In Belgium, there's a tax for things that are too multitasky.”

This tastes like Steve's car.”

(on St. Patrick's Day) Happy Thanksgiving!”

I'd go to a goat rodeo.”

It's like a pair of pants, for your car.”

I haven't had a muffler since 2020”

He's got an eyepatch sorta vibe.”

I thought I was done with zombies.”

How much bread would it take to feed a scorpion for a week?”

I wish I could draw RoboCop.”

I have a weird cheese story for you.”

I've been thinking about that wolf tie.”

I'm not giving my money to YouTube. YouTube is all horsey and gross.”

Cat-flavored ice cream?”

I don't want to chase the red sweater. I just want to buy the red sweater.”

Pockets full of coffee.”

I can tell by the look on your face that you're not going to be of any help.”

It's like, I read books, but I also party.”

It's what's for dinner.”

I can turn my funks off.”

Her abs look like a turtle shell.”

Is that horse wearing shorts?”

Beige is not an image.”

Adam Driver is the Sarah Jessica Parker of men.”

400 pounds plus adrenaline, and I could flip a car, easy.”

There is no reason for Bob Evans.”

Eating peaches with a spoon stinks.”

There is no light, only Dark Mode.”

'M', as in Machu Picchu.”

Steve, you should come look at these sandwich pictures.”

All caps, all the time.”

IE is the DMV of the Internet.”

It doesn't work in IE.”

I am the ghost of Tractor Supply Company.”

I'm sorry about the div.”

What is life if not just a series of great chairs?”

This phone call is messing up my hair.”

Facebook's telling me I'm fat.”

I just smelled fries in my head.”

Gonna write up the changes on a stone tablet like it's the Jurassic era.”

It's like a clown car of drawers.”

We're not counting the tiny chickens.”

This sushi is quite delicious. If you like the taste of death.”

Why'd you put me out like that about the Lion King?”

Was that Rod Stewart?”

I would rather have moist than wet food, thank you very much.”

I don't think real cowboys do this much ironing.”

It's not urgent, aside from the building being on fire.”

They have that dirty ketchup money.”

Oh, sorry! I'll just rewrite the Web.”

I think I was bitten by a rattlesnake in a past life.”

It'll be in the Someone Said that's in your heart.”

The football game or the moon landing?”

You can't out-do the fish with sneakers.”

What don't you think should be converted into a fish tank?”

I'm just not used to Kory wearing pants.”

Maybe it’s coincidence, maybe it‘s Oppenheimer. ”

Salad's nasty.”

That egg is dumb.”

I don't like wearing pants.”

The 80's called and they want their wine back.”

If it's not moist, I'm not interested in having it thrown on my desk.”

Did you say "jQuery" or "Katie Perry"?”

No, *YOU* need megadoses of vitamin D.”

I tried the peanut butter trick with Jelly before.”

That's great, now there's bacon bits in my keyboard.”

C'mon. Lemme see your turkey burgers.”

The meatball machine is broken.”

The cats came with the man.”

Your sweat smells like Dolce & Gabbana.”

Entertainment Tonight is where dreams go to die.”

Why is the llama-cam shaking?”

I love mint-forward. ”

Can I be Josh for Halloween?”

Move. You're where my Diet Coke goes.”